(no subject)

[x_butterfly]

Okay, so this is like the cyber version of making the new kid stand up in front of class and spill all their deepest, darkest secret, right? How 21st century of you guys. This is a lot nicer than where I usually wind up. ‘Cause, you know, mansion. I don’t think people with houses like this usually go “oh, that weird girl who sometimes brings decomposing things back to life is just what I need. She’d go with my new vase!” (Please tell me no one is going to try to match me to a vase. If they try to make me wear something with flowers or butterflies or paisley I am so out of here.)

Is there like a no pawning the silver rule? It seems like the kinda place that needs one of those.

I'm probably doing this whole Care Bear share time thing all wrong, huh? Right. Let's start over.

Dear Diary,

I'm Layla. I'm from New York (city, not just the state) from a little place Lame People call Midtown West, but anyone who's family has legit been there forever still calls it Hell's Kitchen. Unless they've converted to yuppism (I hear that's like Scientology but less creepy) but then they're pretty much in the Lame People category anyway. So, yeah, I'm blonde. I skate. I only trip over my own feet like three times a day. And I make zombies.

Okay, so it's basically zombie roadkill but apparently people don't dig the Roadkill Day of the Dead like you'd think they would. I mean, I pretty much just sometimes bring shit back to life. It’s not that creepy really. Unless you’re like really scared of zombies or something, I guess. Killing spiders takes all day sometimes. That’s annoying.

Matt's a total liar, there's no map. But if you people try to get me lost on purpose while I’m busy already getting lost? I will figure out where you sleep and I will put all the zombie rats in your bed because that is so not on. I don’t know if rabies survives death and then rising from the dead. Someone should do a study on that or something. It could be a legit problem these days.

And Muppet Yoda! I know you're out there in cyberland somewhere! You totally skipped something epic in your recruitment speech! Like how you totally are a Kitty Superhero and rescue damsels in towers and throw the smack down on bad guys and wtf, yo? This is totally why Yoda got replaced with tech, you know. You keep failing me! This is like vitally important 411 and shit. But I guess I'll let you slide this time because YodaPhone is here to save me from your total disclosure fail. (I just need a Yoda voice ringtone for him)

Comments

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

[Voice to Text]

So, you know me, but still. Zombies? Do they want brains or what?

Also, WOOO HELLS KITCHEN!!!! WOOT! WOOT!

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

I assume they've got brains. I mean, they've never had their brains dripping outta their heads or anything. They just sort of get up and walk away. Or shamble. Sometimes they shamble.

Seriously? Did you just "woot woot"? Man...I remember you being cooler as a kid. (I'm kidding)

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

So like...you can resurrect people? Sorta?

Uh huh, suuuuure. I got teased for being a geek, remember? :P

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

I dunno, maybe? It's never happened to anything bigger than a dog before. Maybe it's like the more pissed off or whatever I am the bigger the thing that decides it wants to talk a walk?

Yeah but you didn't say shit like "wootwoot" so you were still cooler than you are now. And dude, that was like elementary school. They didn't even know good insults back then!

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

[Voice to Text]

Do you know how hard it is to get a computer to voice-type "woot woot?" It practically a programming feat!

Anyways, I am much cooler now.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

I thought you could like program it by like recording the word and then teaching it how to spell it? I had a teacher who said she had to teach her voice to text program how to swear for her novel she was writing.

I dunno 'bout that. You might need to do some work to convince me there.

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

[Voice to Text]

I'm not that good with computers. I'm learning though. I can type without the voice program sometimes.

I don't dance.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Don't those things come with instructions? Who needs to be good with computers if you can follow the instructions? Or make someone help you or something.

What does dancing have to do with anything? Wait, are you sharing your secret dream to be like Patrick Swayze or Footloose and shit?

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

that is why I am in school, duh. to learn this tuff. see? Typing without voice to text. all good too. most of my placements ahven't had computers and things for me to use so outside of the special ed room or lighthouse ive never had mmuch computer access.

itmeans I am not going to dance to prove to you how cool I am.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Lighthouse? What lighthouse?

But Matty! I was hoping you'd take me to the dance and woo me. Oh, I'm crushed!

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

Lighthouse is the name fo the place for the blind. where you learn to read braille and buy new canes when you grow and stuff. Lighthouse International.

I will be more than happy to atke you to the dance. And woo you. I just won't do it with my dancing.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Isn't it sort of fucked up to call a place for the blind Lighthouse? I mean the point of a lighthouse is to be a beacon to navigate by so you don't crash on the rocks. Metaphorically it works but literally...not really. It's not like you can see the fucking light.

Please tell me there will be like awesome cane twirling or badass juggling instead. If you won't dance I demand something impressive.

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

Actually, no. It's the place you go so that you can learn to see in the darkness. Anyways, most blind people can see SOME. I cna't see anything, but a lot of blind poeple can see light and dark or various other things, so a lot of it is learning to work with the vision they do have. my blindness was chemically caused so my retinas got fried.

I can twirl my cane, yes. and I bet Molly has a hat I could wear.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Okay then I guess it works better. Still seems like a fucked up name though. Like, they couldn't think up anything better? Wait, you got blinded by chemicals? I thought you said you got hit by a truck? Guess that explains the scars though.

Just twirl your cane or twirl it in a supremely snazzy fashion?

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

The truck was carrying chemicals that spilled. And yes, it does. burned my skin a little.

supremely snazzy of course. and I can box. and do gymnastics. and I'm learning self defense.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Gross. That blows.

Oh well if it's supremely snazzy then that's something. How do you box if you're blind? How would you know where to hit?

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

Yeah.

My dad was a boxer, I learned from him. But, that's part of what I am learning here. I can use my hearing to sort of...be a sonar like a bat or whatever. So I can sort of see outlines of things, sometimes. I'm still learning how to use it, but ask Kyle about my right hook one day. He STILL talks about when I hit him.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

...Do you're gonna grow up to be Batman?

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

No way. Batman blows. Rich dude with too much time and money.

I'm gonna be a daredevil.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

Like one of those asshole stunt guys on Jackass? Lame.

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

Yeah, we gotta get you to stop depending on that though, cause damn you telegraph.

[x-daredevil.livejournal.com]

but it WORKS.

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it works for now but punching people's not the best way to get yourself outta a bad situation (well, unless you punch 'em in the dick, but knees are better for that, we'll get to that later) and you can't like, depend on a lucky right hook.

But pouncing a heavy bag's good cardio and good for stress.

[x-mandelbrot.livejournal.com]

What's that mean? That he telegraphs?

[x-wildchild.livejournal.com]

It means that you can tell he's gonna punch something before he even starts moving. Lex or Cal'll explain it sometime in the regular self-defense class.